Party On, Bachelors
Oft-raucous affairs are a thing of the past as more grooms opt for tamer celebrations. So what are the boys up to?
Image courtesy After Hours
The bachelor party, as portrayed in popular culture, is a groom’s last opportunity for unbridled hedonism before settling into marital bliss.
It’s enough to make future mothers-in-law shudder and brides tremble.
But although bachelor parties are notorious for – we won’t even go there– certain kinds of activities, those aren’t the norm, say wedding planners.
“Bachelor parties were raucous, but that fell out of favor,” says Rita Gutekanst, principal of Limelight, a Chicago catering company.
Although guy parties are still very popular, the tone has changed, say wedding experts.
Bachelor parties are evolving into the kind of celebrations that allow brides to rest easy. Men are golfing, skiing, shooting hoops or sipping aged Scotch as part of their pre-matrimonial bonding experience.
In fact, women inspired the newer and tamer bachelor party, says Gutekanst.
“When women started doing their own parties, such as spa nights [in response to bachelor parties] guys thought they could do real parties too,” Gutekanst says.
For example, she’s catered a basketball party for 20; a beer tasting at a microbrewery and a scotch tasting.
“We served hors d’oeurves [with the Scotch], then steak, potatoes, salad and cigars,” says the caterer.
A short trip is popular if the guests have a couple of days to spare, says Marilyn Oliveira, editor of WeddingChannel.com.
“Going to Las Vegas to gamble and play golf together is a big hit. Grooms are also planning golf outings at Pebble Beach,” Oliveira says.
The bachelor party vacation is a needed fun occasion, Oliveira says.
“The party helps people take a break before the hectic time of wedding planning. You get to see friends you may not see during wedding scheduling.”
Bachelor party tips
If you’d like a bachelor party as part of your wedding festivities, start hinting to the best man. He’s usually assigned to organize and throw it, says Marilyn Oliveira.
The guest list can include groom’s pals and male guests who aren’t invited to the rehearsal dinner. Invitations may be extended to the father of the groom and the future father-in-law, but expect them to decline.
“Your father-in-law may appreciate the invitation but may not want to go skiing with 29-year olds,” says Oliveira.
The bachelor party should take place a few days before the wedding; destination parties are best scheduled several weeks before the wedding so guests aren’t exhausted during the wedding.
“A lot of times the best man will plan the bachelor party as soon as the groom announces his engagement because it’s so much fun,” Oliveira says.
To assure the safety of the guests, the best man should arrange for limousine service to take people home or to their hotels after they’ve been drinking, says Rita Gutekanst.
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